Sucky sticky bun

I eat cereal most days for breakfast. Cheerios, in fact, because they’re good and they’re duh, heart healthy. It was no different today. But this morning, I got in a 5-mile walk that left me spent and ravenous. By 9 a.m. those Cheerios were but a distant memory. Enter: cute cafe on Charles St. where I asked the guy behind the counter what was satisfying.

“Lemon poppyseed muffin?” he offered.

Boring.

“I don’t want to be good,” I said. “I’ll have the sticky bun.”

He proceeded to grab said sticky bun with some wax paper while trying to wrangle it into a plastic container. 

“Just a bag,” I said. You can’t walk and eat out of a plastic container—and the thought of needing a container for the 45 seconds it would take me to wolf down the bun seemed ridiculous.

“You sure?” he said. “This thing is very sticky. I recommend using a fork and saving time to wash up if you have a meeting or something.”

I left with the bun in a bag, now craving the sugary delight in a crack kind of way. Somehow though, in his gushing about the stickiness, he neglected to mention that the sticky buns had been sitting there for two days and were sticky only in the way a brick with a dab or mortar is, which is to say, not much. If I hadn’t already walked so far, I would have gone back, plunked down the sticky brick, and demanded my $3 back, glaring at the lemon poppyseed muffins, which were probably hard as golf balls.

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5 thoughts on “Sucky sticky bun

  1. Heh, I was reading about Cheerios in this week’s Economist, how they’re being forced by the FDA to remove their health claims. No more Bee Healthy, Bee Happy!

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